(snow is everywhere, glistening all purty like, there’s a cheerfulness surrounding the area, you can practically hear I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas playing, until…)
SPLAT!
Tasuki: Ha! Gotchya with my super snowball! Ha ha!
PFf: Oh, yeah? Well I’ll get you with my… (throws snowball, goes past him, hits tree) Arsenal From Above!
Tasuki: O.O AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH!!! (big, giant pile of snow falls on top of him)
PFf: Yes! (singing) I am the champion! I am the champion! No time for Losers (does loser sign on forehead), cause I am the champion …of the world!
Tasuki: finally digging himself out) Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well now tha’ ya won, what now?
PFf: (making snow angel) I dunnnnooooo…
Tasuki: (sweatdropping) Tha’s no ‘elp.
(Chichirifan and Renshi come by)
CF: Whatchya doin’, PFf?
PFf: Makin’ snow angels.
Renshi: Ooo, can I make some too?
PFf: Sure.
Reanshi: Yay! (falls on ground, making snow angel)
CF+ Tasuki: (sweatdop)
Chichiri: (running over) Hey, no da.
Tasuki: ‘ey, what’s th’ rush?
Chichiri: I need a favor, no da.
CF: What is it?
Chichiri: Well, last night I was reading “The Night Before Christmas” to my kids.
Tasuki: Sounds normal enough.
Chichiri: The problem started after I read the story, no da.
(scene goes all blurry and shows Chichiri and his three kids in their room, each kid in their own bed)
Chichiri: Well that’s the end, time for bed, no da. (closes book, tucks them all in and starts to leave)
Chikuma: Dad?
Chichiri: Yes, no da?
Chikuma: Is Santa Claus real?
(PFf: Oh no, not the question. CF: Well he is six; it’s gonna happen sooner or later.)
Chichiri: Of course Santa is real, no da. What made you think he wasn’t?
Kouran: If Santa was real, and he really does land on top of rooftops with a sleigh and reindeer, then how come we don’t hear them?
(Renshi: Ooo, that’s a good one. She’s too smart for her own good!)
Chichiri: Because you’re too deep asleep to hear them, no da.
Chikuma: No way! Kouran wakes up to the slightest sound. The dog five houses away would bark and she’d wake up!
Chichiri: Well Santa is good friends with The Sandman. He makes you go into such a deep sleep that even Kouran wouldn’t wake up.
Kouran: But you said that The Sandman wasn’t real.
Hayate: Reindeer, no da!
Tasuki: Tha’ sucks when they gang up on ya like dat.
CF: Okay, but what does any of this have to do with a favor?
Chichiri: Well, I kinda made a deal with them. So…
Tasuki: (thinking about what it could be, until it finally dawns on him along with the others) Ya didn’t!?
-
(Christmas party at PFf’s house! ^_^ Here’s the guest list:
CF and Renshi
Mac, Jebus (he’s awesome! XD), Senri, and Sephiroth (he’s showing up a lot (sweatdrop))
Chichiri, Alexis, and their three kids (Chikuma, Kouran, Hayate)
Rest of the Suzaku warriors
Xiaolin and Heylin sides
FF7 gang
Straw-hat Pirates
Shaman King gang
Sanzo Party and Kougaiji’s group
members aboard the Bebop
Jack and Sally
Caribbean Pirates trio
Kingdom Hearts group (including Axel)
Guitar Hero characters (including the secret characters)
rest of the +Anima group
various other people, including you! ^_^
(After the Christmas dinner (funded by Scrooge “Bah, Humbug!”), everyone is enjoying themselves, talking, when it was time to sing Christmas carols. Whee!)
PFf: Okay guys, what should we sing?
Renshi: “Twelve Days of Christmas”! On the first-
Everyone: NO!
Renshi: Aww…
Chikuma, Kouran, Hayate: “Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer”!
Sanzo: Oh god, anything but that!
CF: Sorry, kids overrule grumpy old men!
Everyone: (sings funny version of Rudolf) Like George Washington! YAY!
PFf: Hey, guys! Let’s do Snoopy’s Christmas!
All authoresses: CHRISTMAS BELLS, THOSE CHRISTMAS BELLS! RINGING THROUGH THE LAND!...
Various people not singing: AAAAAAHH! MAKE THEM STOP! MY EARS! MY EARS ‘TIS BLEEDING!
Mac: Oh come on! We’re not that bad!
Random person: You killed Jebus! (Jebus pretending to be dead, Senri poking him)
Senri: ……?
PFf: Guess we better stop, huh? (watching Mac chase Jebus with Luci’s pitch fork)
Other authors/esses: nod nod
-
(After everyone calmed down (and Jebus getting some nice holes in his derriere), everyone was enjoying some hot chocolate (Mmm ^.^) and eggnog (Bleh!) and passed their presents to everyone)
Nuriko: (opening box, big make up case inside) Oh, Miaka! You shouldn’t have!
Hotohori: (admiring himself in fancy, elaborate mirror) At last, a mirror worthy for my beautiful reflection.
Everyone else: (grumbles of disagreement)
Mac: (opening box) GASP! Twilight Princess! I Love You, Sephy! (tackles him and hugs the life out of him)
Sephiroth: X.X
Senri: (cute little happy face because he got a bouquet of little flowers) ^.^
CF: Gasp, Get Backers Vol.1! Thanks, Chichiri!
Chichiri: No problem, no da. (admiring brand spanking new fishing pole)
Renshi: GASP! Life Size Kakashi, Tamahome, And Sessomaru Dolls! YAY! (hugging the stuffing out of them)
PFf: Taaaaasukiiiiiiiii…So, didjya get that certain game I wanted? Didjya? Didjya, didjya, didjya?
Tasuki: (getting creeped out) N-no?
PFf: Aww.
Tasuki: I gotchya Ape Escape 3 and Jumping Flash 2, though?
PFf: I LOVE YOU! (pounces him) I KNEW THERE WAS A REASON WE GOT MARRIED!!
Tasuki: @.@
Nuriko: Aww, such a sweet moment!
PFf: So!
Nuriko: Ooo, look! Mistletoe!
PFf: (looking up to see mistletoe) Ack! Hey, who put that there?! (hiding Kouji laughing evilly)
CF: Now you have to kiss. (does evil Tomo cackle)
PFf: Bleh! No way! (pushes him away)
Tasuki: (still) @.@
Jack Sparrow: Now the rum will never be gone! (holding up $100 gift card to a liquor store)
Sora: (holding up Jack Skellington’s “gift”) O.o
Jack: Isn’t it wonderful! I wouldn’t have thought of a better present for you! ^^
Sora: O.o…Uh, y-yeah…
Riku: (poking it) I think it’s still alive. o.O
Cooro: (looking at word on crate) Hey, Husky, look what I got! “Fra-gee-le”. Must be Italian food!
Husky: (looking at word) That’s “fragile”, moron.
Cooro: Ooooo, is it good?
Husky: (hand to face)
Vincent: (taking out a picture frame with Lucrecia’s picture in it from a bag)………LUCRECIAAAAAAA!!!
Reno: (holding a Raising Your I.Q. For Dummies book) -.-…What are you trying to suggest?
Axel: Nothing, really. And look, it comes with a read-along CD! Now you don’t have to hurt that little brain of yours too much!
Reno: At least Rude gave me a better present than you! (pointing at large pile of explosives and fireworks)
Axel: You are a pyromaniac. You must resist the temptation, Reno.
Reno: I’m as much a pyromaniac as you are!
-
(After much present giving, a bit more caroling, some more hot chocolate, eggnog, cookies, cakes, and the like, and an amateur impression of The Nutcracker (Jebus, Tasuki, Ed, Cooro, and Luffy all got into the “special” eggnog. Lookit the sugarplum fairies!), a secret meeting was taking place in the kitchen.)
CF: Alright, Chichiri, how exactly are we gonna go through this?
Chichiri: First, we need ten people, no da.
Renshi: Okay, then we just need…(counting on fingers) five more.
PFf: (whispering) Mac! Get your guys and get over here!
Mac: (comes over) What?
PFf: Chichiri needs some help. All we need now is one more person.
Tasuki: Who’s willin’ to and can keep a secret?
Nuriko: (popping out of nowhere) Ooo, I wanna be let on a secret!
Everyone: AAAH!
Alexis: You guys alright in here?
Chichiri: Y-yes, no da! (after she leaves) Whoa, that was close, no da.
Nuriko: So, what’re we doing?
Tasuki: Why should we tell ya?
PFf: Cause he volunteered! (bonking Tasuki)
CF: What exactly are we gonna do, Chichiri?
Chichiri: I can’t tell you now, no da. Meet me at my house at eleven. (going back to the party)
Tasuki: Do you guys git th’ feelin’ that we shouldn’t a volunteered?
Everyone: (nod nod)
-
(The little group of people are in front of Chichiri’s house, not knowing what they’re getting into)
Sephiroth: Why did you drag me into this?
Mac: Cause PFf asked us to help.
PFf: I wonder what we’re gonna do.
CF: I dunno but Chichiri better hurry, it’s freakin’ cold out here! >.<
Chichiri: (finally comes out) This way, no da. Stay quiet.
Everybody: (goes a little ways away from the house)
Chichiri: Okay, is everyone here, no da?
Renshi: Present!
Chichiri: Good. (teleported somewhere, comes back with fancy red sleigh)
PFf: Wow, where did you get that, Chichiri?
Chichiri: It isn’t real, no da. I’m “borrowing” it from a mall Santa. Okay, now everyone get in lines of two with the last person at the top. (everyone does) Now hold still. (puts hands with index finger out together and concentrates) DA!
POOF!
CF: (cough cough) What happened?
Tasuki: Holy Crap! Tha’s has ta be th’ biggest deer I ever seen!
PFf: Whoa! The scrawny reindeer just spoke!
Tasuki: Where? Where?
PFf: The reindeer sounds like Tasuki. A Reindeer Ate Fangy! O.o
Tasuki: ‘ey! There’s no way I’ll let a freakin’ deer eat me! I’ll turn it inta fried venison!
Sephiroth: Again, why did you drag me into this?!
Chichiri: Shh! Everyone calm down!
Renshi: Wow, you got tall!
Jebus: Why do I feel weird and furry?
Chichiri: Take a look at yourselves, no da.
Everyone: (looks at each other) Whoa!
Tasuki: Uh, Chichiri, I think ya counted wrong. There’s supposed ta be eight reindeer.
Chichiri: I’m not wrong, no da.
Tasuki: Then who’s th’ ninth one?
Chichiri: You are Rudolf, no da.
Tasuki: What?! Why do I gotta be th’ freakin’ weirdo deer?!
Chichiri: Because you were the odd one. I did it the way it was in the story, no da. You were in the front, so you were Rudolf.
Tasuki: But I don’ wanna be no Rudolf? Look at me, I’m a twig!
Nuriko: Ha ha, I got a bigger rack than you, stub head!
Tasuki: Shut it, Prancer!
Nuriko: It’s Cupid!
Chichiri: Either you be Rudolf…(placing special light up nose on him) or you con be an elf. Your choice, no da.
Tasuki: Grr. (nose lights up) Moo.
Chichiri: Thought so, no da.
PFf: Aww, you look cute, Tasuki. Hee hee.
Tasuki: (still glaring, nose starting to make that whistling noise like on the movie, dogs in distance start howling)
CF: Hey, Chichiri, what’re you gonna do?
Chichiri: This, no da! (poofs, turning into the perfect Santa, big white beard, twinkling blue eyes, and big, large gut, in deep voice) Ho ho ho, no da!
Everyone: Wow! Ooo! Awesome!
PFf: Wow, great job, Chichiri!
Chichiri: Thanks, no da! ^^
Mac: You need to work on the ‘no da’s, though, or you’ll get discovered.
Chichiri: Right.
Jebus: Uh, question?
Chichiri: Yes?
Jebus: How are we gonna get there? In case you haven’t noticed, we don’t know how to walk on four legs, let alone fly.
Sephiroth: We know how to fly.
Jebus: Yeah, but do they?
Sephiroth: Good point.
Chichiri: Don’t worry. If everything goes right, you may not have to fly. And the walking is like crawling.
Tasuki: (walking around) ‘ey, yer right!
PFf: (kicks him with back leg) Hey, that was easy too!
Tasuki: OW! ‘ey, don’ kick th’ runt! (both start kicking each other)
Chichiri: Alright everyone, line up, no da.
(Here’s the line up so you get the idea:
Tasuki (Rudolf)
CF (Dasher), Renshi (Dancer)
PFf (Prancer), Sephiroth (Vixen)
Mac (Comet), Nuriko (Cupid)
Senri (Donder), Jebus (Blitzen))
Chichiri: Everyone all good? Now hold still, no da.
Tasuki: Uh, Chichiri? Ya didn’t answer Jebus’s question?
Chichiri: You let me worry about that, no da.
Tasuki: Answer th’ damn question!
Chichiri: (concentrating really hard)
Tasuki: Chichiri? What’re ya doin’? Chichiri? Yer not gonna do what I think yer gonna do, are ya? Chichiri?! No! Don’ do it! Chichiri! CHIIIIIIIICHIIIIIIIIRIIIIIIIIIII!
(whole entire sled plus reindeer disappear)
-
(It’s a quiet night, all is calm, all is not bright, until…)
BOOM!!!
(sleigh lands on Chichiri’s house, quite ungracefully, lights turn on in house)
Chichiri: It worked, no da!
Reindeer: Uuuuuuuuggggghhhh…@.@
Chichiri: I’ll be right back, no da. (picking up sack)
Tasuki: Uuuuuuuhhh…ya basterd…@.@ (Chichiri teleports inside house)
PFf: CF? Linda? Renshi? Ya dead?
CF+ Mac+ Renshi: Yeah, man
Mac: CF? You need to tell Chichiri to work on his landing!
CF: I’ll remember.
Senri: Hurt. @.@
Nuriko: That was fun!
Everyone: (glares at Nuriko)
Nuriko: What? It was.
Tasuki: Chichiri’d better ‘urry up. I wanna go home.
Everyone: (agreeing)
(five minuets later)
Tasuki: (stomping hoof on roof) ‘ey, “Santa”! ‘urry up! We wanna go home!
PFf: Tasuki!
Tasuki: What? We do.
Chichiri: (popping back up) Alright, alright, no da! Let’s go. Pretend like you’re flying. (makes sleigh and reindeer float)
Renshi: We’re flying!
Tasuki: We’re fallin’! (sleigh goes down in front of door, Alexis and kids are there, waving, Chichiri waves back as sleigh flies off)
Chichiri: Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!
-
(It’s the next morning, PFf and Tasuki are visiting Chichiri’s house)
Chikuma: Hey, guess what!
PFf: What?
Kouran: We saw Santa last night!
PFf: Really? Was he nice and jolly?
Tasuki: And fat? (elbowed in stomach) Ow!
Chikuma: Yeah, and we got to talk to him and we all got to eat cookies and everything!
Kouran: And we got to see his reindeer, too! Too bad you didn’t get to see him, Daddy.
Chichiri: (yawning) That is too bad, no da. I really wanted to meet him.
Kouran: (pulling on PFf’s sleeve) Guess what I saw.
PFf: What?
Kouran: I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus.
PFf: (sweatdrop)
Tasuki: So what did Santa git ya guys?
Chikuma: We got a whole bunch of toys!
Kouran: We even got a Wii, just like we asked!
Hayate: Wii, no da! (all run off to play on Wii)
Chichiri + Alexis: (have weird look)
PFf: What, guys?
Chichiri: I gave them all the toys we got for them, no da.
Tasuki: Yeah?
Alexis: We never got them a Wii.
PFf + Tasuki: Then how did…
Chikuma: Dad! Santa left you a note. (handing it to him then running off)
Chichiri: (opens note) “Thanks for covering for me. Yours sincerely, Mr. Claus.” O.#
Others: O.O
-
Chichiri: (passed out on floor, snoring away) Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…
PFf: Wow, he must be really tired after using all that magic.
Tasuki: (drunk at the moment) Bah, humbug! Serfes ‘him righ’!
PFf: (sweatdropping) Anyway, forget him. I would like to thank Christmas (of course), lame TV specials, the annoying Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer movie, A Christmas Story, Cool Runnings, Muppet’s Christmas Carol, snow (I wish we had some T_T), Dirge of Cerberus (again), the …For Dummies series, The Nutcracker, Christmas carols, cookies, hot chocolate (Mmm. Even though it’s too hot for it, it’s freakin’ 80 degrees out here!), cooperation with CF, Mac, and Renshi (You guys are the best! (gives them cookies)), Stariko for her many suggestions (gives her Tasuki plushie (Sorry I didn’t put all of them!!)), and all the people who came to the party! Thanks, guys! God bless you, every one!
Tasuki: Ya talk to munch.
PFf: …Anyway, remember, the contest is still on so continue to send in your tapes! Merry Christmas!
Tauki + PFf: (singing) Feliz Navidad! (hic!) Feliz Navidad! (hic!) Feliz Navidad! Prospero ano y Felicidad! HA ha! (hic!) I wanna wish you a Mery Christmas! From the bottom of my heart!! (hic! Bottom of my hert! hic!)